Sinister Plots

Tomorrow marks the 46th anniversary of JFK's assasination on the streets of Dallas. It was all a sinister plot, you know... and on any given day, one can go to Dealy Plaza and, for a small contribution, be regaled by any number of conspiracy theorists presenting any number of conspiracy theories about what happened on that fateful day. Bring money.
One can visit the Sixth Floor Museum in the old Texas Schoolbox Depository building, take a tour, see the sniper's perch and be regaled with multimedia presentations lamenting the loss of so young a leader.
Or, one can go to another building which houses the Conspiracy Museum, where one can get one's own little tin-foil hat and be as paranoid as one wants. For a small donation.
I've thought of coming up with a series of radio vignettes as a run-up to the anniversary of the Kennedy assasination, something like 22 theories in 22 days. All tongue-in-cheek, you know. Problem being that there are too darn many people with too darn many conspiracy theories who take themselves too darn seriously to see the humor in there being too many people with too many conspiracy theories.
It was bad enough before, but these days, the internet is proving to be an extremely fertile petrie dish for growing conspiracy theories almost as fast as they can be developed... hopping from computer to computer just like the Swine Flu.
Wait a minute, isn't the Swine Flu a conspiracy?
What about our inability to fight the Swine Flu because of a "shortage" of vaccine?
Just this morning, I recieved (for the second time) a reminder that the criminal element were all supporters of Obama. After all, as proof, here's a gallery of criminals wearing Obama gear as their mug shots were taken. Never mind the fact that the usual height indicators were missing from the photos, they were wearing Obama gear!
There was a conspiracy to put Obama in the White House.
There was a conspiracy to make Sarah Palin look like a fool (hatched by none other than David Letterman, no less).
There was a conspiracy to spirit John McCain to North Vietnam just so that he could be a prisoner and run as a Manchurian Candidate in the '08 election (all part of the larger Obama plot, you know!).
Oh, how those sinister plots keep going on and on and on...
The best take on all of the conspiracies has been unfolding in the syndicated cartoon "Non Sequiter" in the past couple of days. Seems that the geeks have put the internet to some sinister use to enslave us and rule the world! Jolly good fun and worth following just for the laugh.
Or even better, there were the antics of Pinky and The Brain which included robots, giant clothes dryers, electric football games, Chia Earth, free T-shirts, a power-mad hamster named Snowball and an abandoned theme park in the middle of the jungle. It made just as much sense as the garbage being shoveled on us since November of 1963.
"It's time to go back to the lab to prepare for tomorrow night!"
"Why? What are we doing tomorrow night?"
"The same thing we do every night, Pinky... try and take over the world!!"

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